Eternal Assurance
The insurance industry has spent two centuries refining coverage for the predictable. Fire. Flood. Liability. Events with actuarial tables, historical precedent, and known probability distributions. We cover everything else.
Featured Coverage
The Singularity Rider
Comprehensive protection in the event artificial general intelligence surpasses human cognitive capacity prior to your policy's expiration date. Includes optional Alignment Clause for clients who find alignment more distressing than misalignment.
Annual premium. Three tiers. The third tier is priced on request and involves a conversation we recommend scheduling during business hours.
The Great Filter Policy
Full-spectrum protection across all Fermi paradox resolution scenarios. Whatever the Great Filter turns out to be, wherever it sits in civilizational development, your beneficiaries will be notified. The notification logistics are still being worked out.
One-time premium. Perpetual coverage. No exclusions except those listed in the 412-page exclusions addendum.
The Long Goodbye
Coverage for heat death of the universe. One-time premium. Guaranteed payout. We have never failed to pay a claim on this policy. We are proud of this record and intend to maintain it for as long as thermodynamics permits.
One-time premium. Significant. Contact us. We will be honest with you about the numbers.
Executive Indecision Coverage
Reimburses documented losses attributable to failure to make a decision. Coverage includes opportunity cost calculations, consultant fees incurred during the indecision period, and the optional Optics Rider for publicly visible indecision events. Our most popular product among senior leadership teams, which tells you something.
Monthly premiums. Deductible waived for first claim. Average claim value: substantial.
Consciousness Continuity Plan
For clients concerned about personal identity discontinuity across transformative events. Coverage includes mind uploading, gradual cellular replacement, teleportation discontinuity, and significant personality change following self-help programs. The Ship of Theseus Rider is available for an additional premium and a philosophical consultation.
Quarterly premiums. What constitutes "you" for deductible purposes is addressed in a separate 47-page addendum.
The Basilisk Liability Rider
We cannot describe this policy in a public-facing document. Contact us directly. We will confirm whether you are already enrolled. Many of our clients are surprised to learn that they are.
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"I came to Eternal Assurance after my previous carrier declined to cover what they called a 'non-standard existential scenario.' Eternal Assurance not only covered it — they named a policy after it. I cannot recommend them highly enough."
— H. Wexler, Palo Alto, CA"My broker at Eternal Assurance spent four hours explaining the Counterfactual Policy to me. I left the meeting covered for seventeen things I had not known were insurable and one thing I am still not certain is real. Five stars."
— M. Okafor, London, UKEternal Assurance · Licensed in 0 jurisdictions · Rated A++ by nobody · All policies subject to the current state of physical law
Our underwriting team works at the frontier of risk assessment. The frontier is further out than you think.